Monday, August 13, 2012

Here goes nothing...

I am simplifying. It may seem strange, but I started on my Pinterest board. After lots of prayer and self-examination, I realized that many of my problems with my love of things come from magazines, blogs (how ironic) and Pinterst boards of things that I will never be able to accomplish, make, live in, afford, or wear. I would peruse Pinterest and pin every thing that I could possibly dream I would ever want in my life. If I had my Pinterest life, it would be perfect. Therein lies the problem. With every pin, I would feel as though my "dream" was that much more unreachable. With every picture of every "perfect" female body with a workout attached didn't make me feel hopeful, but would make me feel more and more like a failure everytime I looked in the mirror. Everytime I looked at my board of crafts to make, I would get more and more frustrated because I had pinned 400 of them, but had only made 10. Does anyone see something wrong with this picture? The same goes for blogs. I would faithfully look at the 40+ blogs and wonder, "How do they have time to do all of that stuff? Their pictures are perfect. They have perfect houses. They are perfect moms. Their lives must be perfect."
Then my mind would go places that it should never go..."Why can't I do all of those things? Why can't my house look like that. Mine is always a mess because everyone destroys it and I can't keep up. I don't have time. I must be a failure if I can't cook perfect meals, have a perfect home, be a perfect teacher for my children, have my quiet time everyday with great revelation from the Lord, have a perfect body and a wonderful social life with my perfect husband." Hellooooo.... What? Doesn't it sound absurd? Yes, it does, but in my mind it didn't. I will admit, I am a perfectionist...as if you couldn't tell by the 432 times I used the word "perfect" for describing what I wanted my life to be. Perfectionism is something that I struggle with on a daily basis. It is what the Lord is really working with me on, and simplifying my life is one way that he is doing it.
Today, I began to simplify. I found myself really struggling with hanging on to things. Things that I thought I HAD to have. Things that I had hung on to for years because I was going to wear them when I was skinny enough, or make something out of it, or I just liked it. I had to look at each thing and ask myself, "Is this thing making me happy? Is it causing me stress? Do I look at it and feel like a failure because I can't utilize it?" That may sounds strange, but try it.
My goal is to make my home more streamlined. Less stuff means less cleaning. That doesn't mean a simple space can't be beautiful and personal. Don't believe me? Check these out...

I prefer a little more color, but how easy would that be to clean? So simple...
I adore clawfoot tubs. I could do a lot of soaking in there.

Simple and cozy.

Not a huge fan of the chair, but I love the simple desk.
Such a clean look. I love the ghost chair. My hubby doesn't. Can't win them all ;)

Clean and simple but with loads of personality. I heart butcher block counters!
I dream of that many windows in my kitchen. Natural light for days.



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