I don't know about you, but I find myself constantly questioning myself. I have spoken about Mommy Guilt before. I have it. I have it bad. I feel guilty about everything and about being perfect (or very imperfect) at everything. I know, it is a silly problem, but don't lie and say that you have never felt that way. If you haven't, for real, please message me and I want to meet you and somehow get you to ooze some of your awesomeness on me. Wait, that sounds gross. You know what I mean. Anywho, reading all of the amazing blogs that I follow, makes me feel worse, but I can't help it. I LURVE reading blogs and getting ideas. The problem is, I have all of these amazing ideas in my brain, and I will never get them done. And so the cycle ensues...I feel even worse.
So, bear with me, I am going somewhere. I have really felt burdened that I am not prioritizing my time as the Lord would see fit. I pray constantly for direction on how to budget my time effectively. I pray that, in spite of myself, that I could fit in A-Z in the 18 hours that I am awake. I don't spend enough time with my Father, I don't spend enough quality time with my kids, and I spend too much time worrying about my house being clean, and projects not getting done, and the weeds in my flowerbeds, and the fact that I STILL don't have a garden, and that I have big boxes in my entryway that have been there for weeks, and that I have food going bad in the fridge, and dust on my baseboards, etc.....
I am making a commitment to myself and my family. My house might get messy. The kids might get messy. Dinners might last an hour to make time for conversation and laughing. Baths may last an hour to make time for bubbles. I might not answer emails right away. I might not even turn my computer on. I might leave dishes in the sink overnight and not care (or at least, try not to care).
I am going to spend time with my kids. I am going to really listen to them and do the things that they want to do and not worry about what I am not doing.
So, if you need me, you know where to find me. But I might not be there...so just leave a message. I'll get back to ya'.